It was a usual morning. Alex woke up late and consequently, was late for work. On her way out to the office, she was mean to her house-help and the driver. As she finally made her way to the office, she didn’t really greet her co-workers and friends well. Most of them were ignored by her and the ones she saw she gave them a grumpy look. She later ended up being mean to a friend who came to her showing her the new pair of earrings she brought.
While all this happened to Alex did you ever wonder what happened to the maid and the driver and the friend, she was being mean to? Well, they ended up with a bad mood too. Why? Simply, because Alex woke up late and was late for work. Isn’t this something like the domino effect.
This isn’t a very dramatic story that you might have expected. It is plain and maybe slightly familiar. Have you ever been an Alex? How many times you ended up being mean to the people around you just because you were having a bad day and became the reason somebody had a bad day?
Remember, being mean isn’t a therapy! That’s not how it has to be. You being mean so that you can give an outlet to the frustration in you isn’t a valid reason or an excuse.
But wait… Is that the only reason we are mean or rude to the people around us. People are mean because it’s cool to be one. Do nice guys even come first? No, they don’t! (As one might think!)
Have you ever been among a group of people where somebody said something mean or was rude to someone and the entire crowd just laughed? It would be really rare if you deny to that, because things like that always happen.
So, who you chose to be or who have you been choosing to be? The mean one or the rude one. How are you in a social setting? Civil or not!
In a TedTalk titled, “Why being respectful to your coworkers is good for business?” by Christine Porath, she discusses incivility as a rising trait among people. Let met sum it up for you.
It mentioned how small uncivil actions can lead to bigger problems. It made people unmotivated.
It was realized that after being subjected to rudeness and incivility in the corporate world about 66% people cut back their efforts. About 80% lost work time by worrying about it and over 12% left their jobs.
In fact, the study found out that, those that experienced incivility function much worse. Even witnesses performance decreased significantly. It also happens if we read or use rude words. Those who read or used rude words, took longer to take decisions and made more errors in their decision. As a part of another study it was found that, medical team who were exposed to rudeness did all their diagnostics poorly and it also decreased their overall performance as they didn’t share information as readily.
Now let’s discuss what might be the Reasons of incivility:
1. Stress
2. Do nice guys finish last? Or Isn’t it cool to be mean?
Hence, incivility in people is a problem. It affects emotions, performance, efforts and brainpower. If you ever watched 13 Reasons Why, maybe you shall be able to relate to it better.
So, now let’s look into what could cure incivility.
1. Greet people nicely.
2. Smile
3. Say hello in the hallway
4. Listen to people
5. Disagree without belittling others for their opinion
So, since we are on the very edge of beginning a new year maybe this could be something really meaningful to start from now. Don’t mock others and be kind. Take care of people’s emotions. The weather now is already cold. We are in need of warm people. Be one!
Let’s be kind to everyone around us. So that in case if you ever happen to meet you walking past you could smile.
Happy New Year!!!!
